Svampbob Fyrkant

Sweden is the second greatest country in the world behind Japan. Here are reäsöns why:

1. Annie lives here
2. The love of my life, Princess Madeleine, lives here (I saw one of her houses today!)
3. They show animated Batman and Superman + Smallville and Desperate Housewives, in English with Swedish subtitles, on terrestrial TV.
4. Sofiero, the world's greatest beer... (well, technically the world's second greatest beer - it was Silver Medalist at the World Beer Cup 2004)
5. ... which tastes great after eight (count 'em McGranty\Eddy G) Hot Dogs...
6. ... polished off with an entire packet of Bilar.
7. They have a massive comic-book library in the centre of town (Sergelstorg, Kulturhuset) in full view of normal people's sight. This place was unbelievable. I was first attracted to it as we walked up from the "Annual Food Festival" at Kungstradgarden and I spotted a massive mural on the front- a beautiful amalgam of The Bat, Olive Oil, Jugde Death and Astro Boy to name a few. We divided in and we were rewarded with somewhere I could happily spend a week - Graphic novels from the US, Japan, England and Continental Europe, in both English and Swedish.
   
   Chatting to the librarian it appears that thisestablishmenttablishement is frequented by norms. 100,000 norms (last year) to be precise. I explained how in England reading comic books in public was prohibited by an Act of Society.
   
   "Not in this town" said the freak book-keeper with the wavy Sartre-esque beard. I didn't really register his confusion. I was still wondering how a library in a foreign country could have an entire run of Judge Dredd books as a small part of its graphic novel collection.
   
   Next door was a cafeteria, undoubtedly selling hot dogs and beer. Like I said, this place is a paradise. I already have a form (in English) to join this crazy "Bibliotek".
8. I'd be committing a cardinal sin if I didn't mention that the women are horrfically more attractive than the Anglo-Irish nastiness we have to put up, but I think that's blatantly obvious to anyone with at least one of the their five senses still intact.
   
   And the one downside:
   
   These "Swedes" don't appear to reprint any DC in a monthly fomat. This is a problem I've had on my preceding five trips to Sweden. I've seen Spider-man, X-Men and Transformers, but no Batman.
   
   NO BATMAN! I HATE SVERIGE! HELVETE!